Monday, January 21, 2013

Be My Valentine Challenge

Valentine's Day seems to always sort of sneak up on me.  I don't like the hoopla of the holiday and I think the commercialism has taken us by storm.  Perhaps my complacency is directly linked to my secret boycott of a holiday that has become an isolated day to show our spouses, significant others, etc., how much we love them in the form of chocolate, flowers, candies, jewelry, or other material things.  I find it annoying and ridiculous.  I almost want to skip it, but I won't.  I concede and buy something or do something nice for a very deserving man that I love very much.  

This year, in a season where our lives are swirling around us, preparing for a new baby who will be 15 glorious months younger than the last, I want it to be meaningful.  I feel that far too often, we imagine a love that will sustain any challenge without any work.  I think we say things like, "We will reconnect in a few months when things slow down," or "He knows I love him," or even worse, "He isn't trying right now either!"  More than anything, I feel that I (and perhaps I am in a lonely corner on this one, though I suspect that is far from reality), have the propensity to believe dry spells in marriage are sustained by good thoughts and false hope.  I want a marriage that overcomes challenging times, but if that is what I want I need to fight like I mean it.             

Women Living Well is hosting a 4 week challenge for Valentine's Day that has caught my eye.  There will be 4 weeks of similar challenges - to praise, encourage, inspire, admire, build up, thank and appreciate our husbands - that I believe are worth our time as wives.  

I am giggling a bit as I write this because on a day like today, I believe that I can do this!  I think my husband rocks and I love him to miniatures  and he is so cool and calm and collected.  We woke up laughing about something our Nora was doing, and shared a nice kiss goodbye.  Life was happy and calm and good.  Buuuuuuuuut, and this is a BIG BUT, this challenge goes for days when I find his dirty socks around the house, have to clean up after something I think he should have really taken care of himself and/or take up for where he is lacking.  This challenge goes for the days where I feel like I have done a great job keeping up despite all the glorious symptoms of the 8th month of pregnancy, and feel he hasn't met my expectations, and I refuse to offer grace or mercy in his direction.  It goes for days where crabbiness wins and, because of my poor attitude or his, he is difficult to live with, and all of his shortcomings are magnified.  Yup, all of these days too.  

I am up for the challenge.  Are you?  Let's join together and work on our marriages this month.  Let's show Hallmark how it's done and glorify God with marriages that make the enemy tremble with despair.  

Pray for me as I embark on this challenge.....and let me know if you're planning to do this too in the comment section below.                  

Week 1 January 21st - Look for ways to praise your husband verbally. Praise him in front of the kids, friends, family, co-workers, on facebook, tweet it – get praise out anyway you can! Try to mention something noteworthy he has done – in his role as provider, father, husband, lover, or friend. If the thought of trying to come up with one terrifies you, then pray right now that God will give you new eyes to see your husband as God does. Then open your mouth and say something kind and uplifting to your husband today and tomorrow and the next day until Valentine’s Day arrives!


  1. Thank you Michelle for writing this and challenging us. I will be praying for you and joining in.

    1. Wonderful Jessie! Please feel free to send follow-ups as we pray for each other! Love you and miss you much!

  2. Love the encouragement to invest in my husband and my marriage...

    1. Great Kara! Glad you are encouraged.